RosesareredCancerisblue's Comments

How are you

jkjones — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 04:51:40 GMT

Pat,

I just wanted to let you know that my husband lost his battle with gastric cancer on August 4th. He was so sick. He was in so much pain. The last month of his life was miserable. It was 24/7 care. I feel like half of me is gone. I grieve so much for him. I had a wonderful life with him. We were married for 23 years and have a 20 year old son. I am so scared for my son. It will be so hard for him without his father. I just feel so empty. I have been told that with time it will get better. Right now it doesn't seem that way. Please keep in touch. I know that it will help me to talk to someone.

Love,

Judy from Tennessee

How are you ?

perryswife — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 06:14:15 GMT

I haven't heard from you since you replied to me. I care for my husband who has gastric cancer, this is the least I can do for the one person in this world ( beside our children ) who I would lay down my life for. It's so difficult being helpless as a caregiver. I can't " just make it go away ", and that is so frustrating, all I can do is love and care for him as I know he would do for me, at least that gives me something. You are a lucky woman...yes, lucky, some people have nobody to care for them, imagine how that must feel. Let your husband love you...you would do the same for him, no?

Husbands

bigsciota — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 19:03:54 GMT

Roses, I pray for you. I understand what you mean about your husband. Through this whole ordeal I have been more worried about my husband than myself. I felt like no matter what I would be okay. I knew that I would either be taken home to spend eternity in heaven or I would recover and be okay. But my husband and children, they were the ones I was worried about. My husband lost both of his parents in a 2 year span, his father had PSP and we knew it was coming. His mother was killed in a head on collision by a drug impaired driver. He had been through so much I just can't imagine him making it through losing me.

I came to realize that taking care of me is so important to him. Women are always the care-takers and as a result it is hard for us to let others be that person. I think it has really helped my husband feel that he has some power over a completely powerless situation. He NEEDS to take care of me and it really makes him happy. It has strengthened our marriage and we already had a great marriage. Let him take care of you. I assure you it gives him joy to do so. We are both so lucky to have such good men. They are not that common these days. I am so grateful God blessed me with such an incredible man.

Keep strong!

Sandy (Norm's wife) [:)]

Hang in there!

jkjones — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 20:25:37 GMT

As you said in your updates, you have to take everyday at a time. My husband has stage 4 stomach cancer, and it is inoperable. I have seen a very strong man just wither away. His outlook looks very bleak, At one time, he was remission and it returned with a vengeance. It is nice to know that you have someone to talk to. It makes dealy with the situation a little easier. Just hang in there and be strong.

Judy(chuck's wife)